Convincing myself to sit down and write a blog post is like herding cats. But I’m here now, so that’s what counts…right?? Today I just wanted to outline my new plan and my goals for the next few months.
My new regimen is an oral combination of a pill and a liquid solution of Ocean Spray Cran-Grape (no, seriously) and chemo. These drugs are much more tolerable than my previous ones, and you’ll notice I didn’t mention any inpatient parts. I’ll go to clinic just once a week to check counts, but these drugs aren’t expected to affect counts nearly as much. I may even get to go to Clemson in the spring. I don’t want to jinx myself, though, so I’ll leave it at that. Just picture me quietly vibrating with excitement about it.
Soon I’ll start radiation to the area behind my sinus. I’ll have 6 weeks of it, 5 days each week, for about 5-10 minutes a day. The side effects we’re most worried about are possible throat and mouth sores, but they shouldn’t show up until the last few weeks. I’ve already had my headrest, mouthpiece, and mask made so that my head will be in the exact same place each day.
A cure is against the odds. I’m not eligible for trials because the disease is too small to be measurable, which is a a good thing. There are lots of trials going on right now, though, so if I am ever eligible in the future there are other possibilities. Regardless, I don’t think about odds too much. I’m a person, not a percentage.
I’m most excited about the combination of freedom and treatment this new plan offers me. I won’t be dependent on counts, inpatient chemo, or long fever stays determining what I do and don’t get to do. I even had sushi the other day. Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had sushi? The answer is very long. I’m also not too concerned about going through radiation. The side effects are different this time, but I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again. Is the mask they made really really really close to my face? Does that make me bug out a little? …..yes. But as I always say, nut up or shut up.
The response to my first post was overwhelming and amazing. I am so grateful to everyone who liked, commented, shared, messaged me, etc. I’ll take all the prayers I can get. If I could hug each and every one of you, I would. Believe you me.